Someone's life

I want

2005-11-29T00:06:00.000+02:00

I'm tired, I'm so tired of being alone; I'm tired of doing everything alone; I'm tired of the thought of being alone and I'm tired of constantly being reminded of that everything depends on me and me alone. I want to share joyous moments and sad moments with someone - I want to share them with YOU! I want to wake up every morning next to you. I want....I want... I want...

My birthday

2005-10-30T07:49:00.000+02:00

On October 24th I turned 26!!! Wow! Another year passed by! Many things has happened in my life during this year: I lost 29 kilos :0), I got a new job, and I started my last year of university! And these are just a few of events; not to mention other things that took place in my life, my soul, my thoughts and emotions.

But this is not the purpose of today's writing...I wanted to tell everyone how much I'm thankful for my friends! They have stood with me, cried with me, laughed with me and continued to support and encourage me despite all my ups and downs.

Moreover they threw me a birthday party that has meant so much to me! First we went to a restaurant on the 10th floor in the hotel "Lielupe" (http://www.lielupe.lv) in Jurmala (http://www.jurmala.lv) which has the most incredibly awesome view on the Baltic beach - the sunset was simply amazing and breathtaking and it all came in a package with toasts, compliments, kind words that has warmed my soul. After that we went to another restaurant "Jura" where we had some desert, listening to the live music, singing along and dancing - it was so much fun!!!

Thank you, my dear ones, for everything!
You are way too cool and way too special!
I appreciate you all so much!
And I treasure your friendship!
Love,
Always,
Yours,
Tinulja :0)

A story: my brother Kevin

2005-10-13T09:35:00.000+03:00

"My brother Kevin thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night. He was praying out loud in his dark bedroom, And I stopped outside his closed door to listen. "Are you there, God?" he said. "Where are you? Oh, I see Under the bed." I giggled softly and tiptoed off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement.But that night something else lingered long after the humor. I realized for the first time the very different world Kevin lives in.He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled as a result of difficulties during labor. Apart from his size (he's 6-foot-2), there are few ways in which he is an adult. He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 7-year-old, and he always will.He will probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is the one who fills the space under our tree every Christmas, and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them.I remember wondering if Kevin realizes he is different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life? Up before dawn each day, off to work at a workshop for the disabled, home to walk our cocker spaniel, return to eat his favorite macaroni and cheese for dinner, and later to bed.The only variation in the entire scheme are laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child.He does not seem dissatisfied. He lopes out to the bus every morning at 7:05, eager for a day of simple work.He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores.And Saturdays-oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to have a soft drink, watch the planes land, and speculate loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. "That one's goin' to Chi-car-go!" Kevin shouts as he claps his hands. His anticipation is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights.And so goes his world of daily rituals and weekend field trips. He doesn't know what it means to be discontented.His life is simple. He will never know the entanglements of wealth or power, and he does not care what brand of clothing he wears or what kind of food he eats.His needs have always been met, and he never worries that one day they may not be. His hands are diligent. Kevin is never so happy as when he is working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it. He does not shrink from a job when it is begun, and he does not leave a job until it is finished.But, when his tasks are done, Kevin knows how to relax. He is not obsessed with his work or the work of others. His heart is pure. He still believes everyone tells the truth, promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize instead of argue.Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances. Kevin is not afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere. And he trusts God.Not confined by intellectual reasoning, when he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God - to really be friends with Him in a way that is difficult for an "educated" person to grasp. God seems like his closest companion.In my moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity, I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith. It is then that I am most willing to admit that he has some divine knowledge that rises above my mortal questions.It is then I realize that perhaps he is not the one with the handicap – I am. My obligations, my fear, my pride, my circumstances - they all become disabilities when I do not trust them to God's care.Who knows if Kevin comprehends things I can never learn. After all, he has spent his whole life in that kind of innocence, praying after dark and soaking up the goodness and love of God.And one day, when the mysteries of heaven are opened, and we are all amazed at how close God really is to our hearts, I'll realize that God heard the simple prayers of a boy who believed that God lived under his bed. Kevin won't be surprised at all!"

Life is a battlefield

2005-09-22T13:34:00.000+03:00

I have finally come to realize or perhaps to accept the fact that life is a battlefield. We are in a constant battle. We win or loose every minute of our lives. And the sooner we realize it, the more battles we will win - cause knowing that we are in a battle gives us the alertness and courage to stand no matter what!

But in all circumstances we need to learn to laugh because laughter is refreshing to the soul, and we also need to see things as God sees them, we need His perspective! Otherwise we won't make it. We can't make it without Him!

Amedeo Modigliani

2005-09-17T23:57:00.000+03:00

This morning I watched a movie directed by Mick Davis "Modigliani".

The story of Modigliani is well-known. However, this film gives it life with a wonderful script, amazing cinematography, and mind-blowing performances by Andy Garcia and Elsa Zylberstein, a little-known French actress. I was glued to the screen from start to finish and have recommended it to everyone. See it while you can. It's a true find, and one that will stay with you long after you left the theatre.

Plot summary: Set in Paris in 1919, biopic centers on the life of late Italian artist Amedeo Modigliani, focusing on his last days as well as his rivalry with Pablo Picasso. Modigliani, a Jew, has fallen in love with Jeanne, a young and beautiful Catholic girl. The couple has an illegitimate child, and Jeanne's bigoted parents send the baby to a faraway convent to be raised by nuns. Modigliani is distraught and needs money to rescue and raise his child. The answer arrives in the shape of Paris' annual art competition. Prize money and a guaranteed career await the winner. Neither Modigliani, nor his dearest friend and rival Picasso have ever entered the competition, believing that it is beneath true artists like themselves. But push comes to shove with the welfare of his child on the line, and Modigliani signs up for the competition in a drunken and drug-induced tirade. Picasso follows suit and all of Paris is aflutter with excitement at who will win. With the balance of his relationship with Jeanne on the line, Modigliani tackles this work with the hopes of creating a masterpiece, and knows that all the artists of Paris are doing the same.

And here's a short biography of this man, that you amy find interesting.
Tagline: His passion was life. His obsession was art. "Amedeo Modigliani was the bohemian artist par excellence - his posthumous legend is almost as famous as Van Gogh's. In stylistic terms he was an oddity: contemporary with the Cubists, but not part of their movement, he forms a bridge between the generation of Toulouse-Lautrec and the Art Deco painters of the 1920s.

"He was born in Livorno in July 1884. Both sides of his family were Sephardic Jews. His father Flaminio was an unsuccessful entrepreneur who had a small money-changing business, and his mother, Eugenia, by far the stronger personality of the two, ran an experimental school. Amedeo, in childhood nicknamed Dedo, was their fourth and youngest child. Thanks largely to Eugenia Modigliani, the atmosphere of the household was always unconventional; in 1898 the eldest son, Emmanuele, then aged twenty-six, was sentenced to six months imprisonment as an anarchist.

"In 1898 Modigliani began formal art training under Guglielmo Micheli, a pupil of Giovanni Fattori, the leader of the Macchiaioli - the Italian equivalent of the Impressionist movement. To begin with, Modigliani's literary tastes were more advanced than his artistic ones: his favourite poet was Lautréamont, author of Maldoror, who was later to have immense significance for the Surrealists. He left home and went to Florence, where in May 1902 he registered under Fattori at the Scuola Libera di Nudo (Free School of the Nude). In March 1903 he transferred himself to Venice, where he registered at a similar academy. There he met two of the artists who were to be among the leaders of Futurism Umberto Boccioni and Ardengo Soffici. More important, he had his first real introduction to the pleasures of drugs and drink.

"In the winter of 1906 he decided to go to Paris, and his mother agreed to give him a small allowance. The Paris which attracted him was already fading into the past, and he seems to have been rather wary of the new generation of experimentalists which gathered round Apollinaire, though he did go to live in Montmartre, which was at that time undoubtedly the focal point of the avant-garde. Thanks to French anti-semitism (of a sort which at that time was almost unknown in his native Italy) he discovered a much stronger sense of Jewish identity, and his friends in the Paris art world were mainly Jewish. They included Soutine, Kisling, the sculptor Lipchitz and the poet Max Jacob - his one real link with the circle around Picasso. He rapidly made a reputation for his excesses (he had a habit of stripping stark naked when drunk), and his nickname changed from the childish Dedo to Modi (a pun on the French maudit, or 'accursed'). In 1909 he retired for a while to Livorno, sick and exhausted.

"When he returned, now settling in Montparnasse, the new artists' quarter, he decided to change direction, and became a sculptor. The master he chose was Brancusi, and there is a definite link between his work and Brancusi's in this medium. There are also clear signs of influence from the art from Africa and Oceania which Modigliani saw in the Musée de l'Homme. Though he was closer to finding his artistic direction, he was still miserably poor - his sculpture was made mostly from stone stolen from building sites, easy to find as Paris was then in the grip of a building boom. In 1912 he once again fell ill, and was forced to go home for a rest. But it never seems to have occurred to him to remain in Italy; he returned to Paris as soon as he could.

"What stopped him carving, and led to the final phase in his work, was the outbreak of the First World War. This brought the building boom to an abrupt halt; Modigliani in any case was no longer feeling strong enough for the hard physical labour of shaping blocks of stone. When he painted it had always been directly from the motif, and now he became a specialist in portraits whose delicate stylization showed the influence of his period as a sculptor, and whose elegance and wit belied his reputation for uncouth behaviour. Some of his acquaintances thought that the uncouthness was a little cultivated - Picasso said sarcastically: 'It's odd but you never see Modigliani drunk anywhere but at the corners of the boulevard Montmartre and the boulevard Raspail.'

"In the early years of the war Modigliani embarked on an affair with the South African writer Beatrice Hastings. She was some five years older than he was (he was now thirty), and had had a picturesque career. One of her previous conquests had been Katherine Mansfield. She had a little money, and Modigliani was able to live in more comfortable circumstances. But the relationship was marked by heavy drinking and Modigliani and Beatrice often came to blows - on one occasion he threw her out of a window.

"From a professional point of view he was doing a little better -the ambitious young dealer Paul Guillaume was starting to take an interest in his work. But, as a portrait shows very clearly, Modigliani found Guillaume's personality unsympathetic, and in 1916 he transferred his allegiance to the Polish dealer Zborowski.

"Modigliani's affair with Beatrice Hastings was now over. He had been doing some drawing at the Académie Colarossi, and here, in July 1917, he met Jeanne Hébuterne, who was then aged nineteen. Soon they were living together. Their public scenes became even more famous in Montmartre than Modigliani's rows with Beatrice. One eye-witness, André Salmon, reports:

He was dragging her along by an arm, gripping her frail wrist, tugging at one or another of her long braids of hair, and only letting go of her for a moment to send her crashing against the railings of the Luxembourg. He was like a madman, crazy with savage hatred."Yet some - though not all - of Modigliani's many portraits of Jeanne show real tenderness; others show her as impassive and curiously graceless. By early 1918 conditions in Paris had become so difficult that Zborowski decided to move his whole stable to the South of France - he now represented Soutine, Kisling and the Japanese artist Foujita, as well as Modigliani. Modigliani settled obediently in Nice, but the Mediterranean climate and landscape had no real appeal for him. He continued to paint portraits indoors, often of local shopkeepers and their children. In February 1918 Jeanne became pregnant, and soon afterwards she and Modigliani separated for a while, probably because he loathed her disapproving and overbearing mother who had also moved South. They were reunited before the baby, a daughter, was born. Modigliani got drunk on the way to register the child as his own, and she remained officially fatherless, though she was later adopted by his family in Italy. In May 1919 he returned joyfully to Paris, the only environment he really liked. Jeanne, for the moment, was left behind, pregnant for a second time.

"Thanks to Zborowski's efforts, Modigliani's paintings were at last starting to fetch respectable prices. In the summer of 1919, with the help of Osbert Sitwell, Zborowski arranged a show of French art at the Mansard Gallery in London. It was a success, and it was one of Modigliani's works which fetched the highest price. The purchaser was the writer Arnold Bennett, who said that the painting reminded him of his own heroines. In June 1919 Modigliani and Jeanne were able to move into their first real home, an apartment in the rue de la Grande Chaumière, immediately above one which had once been occupied by Gauguin. But Modigliani's health was steadily deteriorating and his alcoholic collapses were becoming more frequent. He celebrated the New Year of 1920 in fine style, but about a fortnight later was stricken with pains in his kidneys and took to his bed. After some days his neighbour downstairs, another painter called Ortiz de Zarate, called in to see if anything was the matter. He found Modigliani delirious, complaining of a violent headache. The bed was strewn with empty bottles and half-opened cans of sardines which were dripping their oil on to the coverlet. Beside him sat Jeanne, who was nearly nine months pregnant; she had not thought of sending for a doctor. Ortiz de Zarate summoned one immediately. He came, and declared the case was hopeless: Modigliani was suffering from tubercular meningitis. He died on 24 January 1920, without regaining consciousness. There was an enormous funeral, attended by the whole of Montmartre. Jeanne, who had been taken to her parents' house, threw herself out of a fifth floor window two days after Modigliani's death, killing both herself and her unborn child."

Some of his paintings you amy find here: http://www.mystudios.com/gallery/modigliani/gallery_wall.html

The anointing

2005-08-08T16:15:00.000+03:00

The anointing. The word means to smear with oil, and if you will allow the anointing to rise within you, if you'll allow the smearing of the Holy Spirit upon you, you will make it through every narrow place that has been set before us. God wants to bring us through every narrow place and establish us in our destiny. Our lives are neither accidents nor mistakes. We were in the heart of God long before we were in the thoughts of our parents. Before God put stars in the sky, before He caused the sun and moon to shine, before galaxies were set on their courses, God had us in His heart. He planned for our lives and has a destiny for each of us to fulfill.

It doesn't matter what other people, circumstances or life experiences have told us. God has a special purpose for our lives and He has provided the necessary spiritual equipment for us to be successful. This equipment is called the anointing. Isaiah 61:1-4.

The anointing is not a feeling, an idea, or an atmosphere. It is a knowing. It is the assurance that God is with us. And there is more...The anointing is a Person - Emmanuel, God with us, the Messiah, the Christ!

The anointing is THE PRESENCE OF GOD, which in turn releases THE POWER OF GOD!

The presence of God the Holy Spirit leads to the anointing of the Spirit, which is the power of God and the power of God brings forth the manifestation of the presence. The anointing itself - an anointing of the Holy Spirit - cannot be seen, but the power, its manifestation, its effect, can and should be seen. That is why I call it "the tangible anointing".

The anointing enables us to do what we can't do on our own!

Never alone

2005-06-26T21:29:00.000+03:00

When I stub my toes and feel alone - too weak to go on, it is then that He carries me, lifting me up, reminding me that if He is with me I will never be alone!!!

Let God put it all together

2005-06-26T21:21:00.000+03:00

A grandfather was passing his granddaughters room one night and overheard her repeating the alphabet in an oddly reverent way, as if she were talking to God.

"What on earth are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm saying my prayers, grampa. I couldn't think of exactly the right words tonight. So I'm just saying all the letters. God will put them together for me, because He knows what I'm thinking".

Whatever the situation that we are in and whatever heartache we maybe going through and whatever things we don't know and may not understand, let us always surrender to God and LET HIM PUT IT ALL TOGETHER!!!

THE BRICK

2005-06-19T22:49:00.000+03:00

A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door! He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown.

The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up against a parked car shouting,"What was that all about and who are you?Just what the heck are! you doing? That's a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?

"The young boy was apologetic."Please, mister..please, I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do,"He pleaded. "I threw the brick because no one else would stop..."With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. "It's my brother," he said."He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up." Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, "Would you please help me get him back into hiswheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me."

Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts. A quick look told him everything was going to be okay..

"Thank you and may God bless you," the grateful child told the stranger. Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home. It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented sidedoor. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message "Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention! "God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. .Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us. It's our choice to listen or not.

Who said it is going to be easy?

2005-06-16T10:31:00.000+03:00

We all know that the Promised Land is our inheritance, our prophetic destiny. It’s what God has promised us in His word and what He has spoken to us through the mouths of the prophets.

The Bible is full of God’s promises and we want to inherit the land of God’s promise—the milk, the honey, the fruitfulness and the abundance that God has for us.

BUT there are schemes and tactics of the devil to oppose and hinder us from entering into everything that God has for us. Who said it is going to be easy?

So what does the Promised Land look like? When the Lord wanted Moses and the nation of Israel to enter the Promised Land (Canaan) He told Moses to make plans to send a leader from each of the 12 tribes to spy out the land of Canaan (Num. 13:2). “And they went up through the South and came to Hebron; Ahiman, Sheshai, and Talmai, the descendants of Anak, were there.” (Num. 13:22).

They proceeded to Hebron and they saw that the whole area was overtaken by giants, the descendants of Anak. These giants walked in such great darkness that they possessed substantial demonic authority that strengthened the principalities and powers over that region. When the spies entered this area, instead of breaking through spiritually and remembering that God promised them the land (of Canaan—Num. 13:2), they came under the existing demonic strongholds. All but two of the spies, Joshua and Caleb, became completely intimidated by the giants’ huge stature.

So when they returned home, ten of the spies gave a very convincing bad report (Num. 13:25-33). So all the people rebelled and wanted to stone Joshua and Caleb (Num. 14:1-10). Ten of the spies forgot how big God is and so they became deceived and believed that they could not overcome the enemy. The enemy won that particular battle without laying one finger on the emerging nation of Israel. Talk about a battle for their minds!

The ten spies were judged by God and died immediately from a plague (Num. 14:37). And the whole generation that listened and believed the bad report ended up dying in their unbelief as they wandered for 40 years in the wilderness. It’s also interesting to see that their children lived to inherit the Promised Land and did not get into unbelief like their parents, but they suffered for their parents’ unfaithfulness (Num. 14:31-33).

Here in Numbers 13:22 it talks about Anak and his descendants. Anak means to choke and to strangle as if strangling someone with a necklace. The devil wants to choke out, strangle and suffocate the promise of God; often by a slow process.

There are mentioned 7 descendants of Anak: the Jebusites, the Girgashites, the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Perizzites, the Amorites, and the Hivites. Each of them has its own meaning and are the enemies of the Promised Land. I would like to focus on one of them, simply because this one I've encountered recently personally while struggling to believe God that HE IS THE ONE THAT WILL LEAD ME INTO THE PROMISED LAND IF ONLY I WILL TRUST AND BELIEVE HIM!

Perizzite. Perizzite means opened and unwalled. This tribe was a roaming tribe that never bothered to secure their dwellings by building walls and cities. This open, unprotected existence represents a type of “spirit of immorality.” We also call this spirit the “spirit of Babylon” which represents lust and immorality. Here’s how the spirit of Babylon works. It tries to seduce. If we are led away, tempted or enticed away from the call of God on our lives, our godly principles or our conduct, then we’ve been seduced by the spirit of Babylon. It specializes in persuading us to forget our purpose and destiny, the promises of God and our commission.

Let me give some examples. It really is true, “Pride comes before a fall” (Prov. 16:18). It’s all too easy for even an older mature man in ministry to give in to the lust for money and sexual immorality once he’s been taken over and deceived by pride. A ministry can be destroyed almost overnight because of the power of lust. We hear sometimes of a pastor who slipped into sexual sin and the ministry he was entrusted with is over, just like that. God is merciful and the pastor can be restored eventually if the proper steps are taken, but everything that the ministry was coming into in the future will come into jeopardy. Also, similar temptations are there especially for young single men who travel by themselves in the ministry and don’t keep themselves protected and accountable. Pornography is trying to lure all of us. This stronghold is after us on the internet, it’s after us in the video store and it’s after us in magazines, to name a few.

There is another tactic that this enemy uses and it is in the area of fantasy. Sometimes women fantasize about a relationship; they’re waiting for that “prince.” Kathryn Kuhlman just about threw away her whole ministry for a man. The relationship seemed to offer her everything that she needed in the natural, especially the emotional comfort. The guy was even a Christian in the ministry himself. But something happened to the anointing and God told her to cut off the relationship with this man. It wasn’t even that she was in sexual sin.

Ungodly soul ties go hand in hand with acts of immorality. Men and women can mess up their lives by falling for the lie that they can date and dabble in a relationship until their right marriage partner comes along. “Well it seems so right God.” But it’s wrong and in the end it doesn’t work out and when you meet the one that is meant for you there is unnecessary baggage, emotional pain and bondage because of past relationships.

I don’t believe in dating in the kingdom of God! I believe we can ask the Lord, “What man is meant for me?” Or, “God, what woman is meant for me?” I believe that God has a marriage partner for me. And I don’t need to “try before I buy.” That’s a dangerous game. There is no trying and buying in the kingdom of God—let’s see if I like this one or if I like that one. God has an Adam for me. I choose to wait!

We should not let the devil destroy the promise because of temptation. “It’s mutual, we’re just friends. We can hang out at night at 3 a.m.” The next thing that happens is that you’re in sin, guilt and condemnation. Then the devil rubs your face in it and he begins to accuse you and then you don’t even feel worthy to be what God said you should be. So you just give up and keep on sinning anyways because “I blew it already so I might as well keep on going.” That's how the spirit of Babylon works! If you fall down, don’t let the devil keep kicking you! Get up! “Do not rejoice over me, my enemy; when I fall, I will arise; when I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me” (Micah 7:8). If you’ve blown it, make it right with the Lord and others. Then leave it behind, go on, be wise and be on guard. Because the second tactic is that the enemy wants to keep us locked in guilt and condemnation for the damage we have done. But when you’ve made it right, you’ve made it right!

Loneliness

2005-06-09T11:42:00.000+03:00

The things that go through our heads when we're feeling lonely may sound sort of selfish, but we have real needs. Don't we matter? We have a real need to be connected to other people. We have a real need to love and be loved, to value and to be valued. When there is not enough of that sort of connection in our lives, we feel lonely. Ignoring loneliness, or feeling guilty about it, makes as much sense as ignoring physical hunger or feeling guilty about it. It's sometimes reasonable to ignore hunger for a while, if there's nothing you can do about it at the moment, but there comes a point when you need to eat.

We were designed to be focused outside of ourselves, but sometimes — perhaps because of a move, illness, or change of a job — we find ourselves focused on ourselves. We were designed to have an interest and concern for others. But we can't just force ourselves to change. Other people may tell us exactly what we need to do, but it isn't that simple. We don't know how to begin. We don't know how to overcome the awkwardness of being needy. We are needy people. We need to be loved, to be known, to be treasured.

The two great commandments in the Bible are, briefly, "Love God" and "Love your neighbor". Loving God enables us to love our neighbor because when we love God we can experience his love for us in return. We can live our lives secure in the knowledge that God loves us, knows us, understands us. This rooted security gives us a basis for caring about others, for being concerned about their problems and lives.

As we turn our attention to God, we are brought out of our self-absorption and begin to have love and life to give to others, love and life that God gives us.Loving God enables us to love others more freely and generously. And a person who genuinely cares about others is never lonely for long.

Favor

2005-06-08T13:15:00.000+03:00

Favor attracts blessings, gifts, fruitfulness and prosperity ( Ps.45:12; Deut.28:1-12; Acts 4:33 -34).

Favor opens doors of opportunity (Joseph: Genesis 37-48).

Favor gives us a voice of authority in the nation (Just read the book of Esther!)

Favour gives us victory and advantage in warfare (Ps.5:12 ; 110:2; 2 Cor 2:14)

Favor is: a state of being; held in high regard; to be granted advantage; to be linked, supported, facilitated, and approved of; to be bestowed upon with blessings.

Who wouldn't want all of this operating in their lives? When we are in Christ, we are given this favor as a gift – it is undeserved favor that is available to each of His children!!!

So let's ask the Lord for an increase of His favor! Let's walk in His favor each and every day of our life and let's sow favor into the lives of others!

Darkness

2005-06-07T16:58:00.000+03:00

I was reading a devotional by Patricia King today (http://extremeprophetic.com) called "Standing in the evil day" (you can find it on her web site under "Articles & Teachings") Here, I just wanted to share a few thoughts out of it.

When man turns away from God darkness and dreadful consequences follow. This has been a consistent pattern all throughout the history of man. In Isaiah 61:2 it says that "a day will come when darkness will cover the earth and gross darkness the people". Jesus also stated in Matthew that in the last days, lawlessness will increase and people's love will grow cold.

But the good news is that the Lord will raise up a standard of righteousness in that hour. We, His people, are that standard. The earth will be filled with the knowledge of the Glory of the Lord!

The decay of morality and righteous foundations in our nations are obvious: many are comfortable with allowing abortion, same-sex marriage and drug use. Increasing numbers of individuals engage in pornography, addictive behavior and crime. Marriage and the family are falling apart. The divorce rate is sky-rocketing.

Many Christians have grown cold in their love for the Lord and have lowered the standards; yet we are called to be the light, we are called to be an example in this world and to lift His standard! If the devil can get us to lower our standards - that means he gets us out of the battle field and we are no good ... we are no longer a threat to him. We are to stand strong in Him!!! The devil is not asleep and the first ones he is going to try to defeat is us - cause if he can defeat us, he automatically defeats the rest of world - those that have not yet found Him!

So how can we stand against this darkness and what are some things that will help us to stand and prevail in the midst of this current darkness? Here are a few things that Patricia shares:

- Turn your heart completely to Him. Invite the Holy Spirit's conviction. Repent of all known sin and ask the Lord to forgive you.
- Put on the whole armor of God. This means to stand in faith concerning who you are in Christ.
- Confess the Word over your life daily.
- Walk close to the Holy Spirit. Be aware of His presence. He will lead and guide you into all truth. He will also convict you when you are walking out of God's will.
- Pray for the Lord's righteousness to rule in the earth.
- Invite the Lord to bring conviction of sin to the masses.
- Honor God and give Him thanks in all things.
- Pray for the Body of Christ to powerfully advance the Kingdom under the anointing of the Holy Spirit. Trust the Lord to keep you in His truth and righteousness: Now unto Him who is able to keep you from falling and present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding great joy. (Jude 24)

Let us continue to stand strong!
Lift that standard higher!

Simple words

2005-06-06T15:09:00.000+03:00

You have probably noticed how simple words can bring you new hope and encourage your soul...But have you ever thought about how God uses ordinary people, unexpected people and even things, to reveal to you a simple truth about yourself, to tell you something special or to encourage you to move on...not giving in, not giving up, but keep pressing in and keep seeking Him!

In the midst of the exams and writing my research paper for the university, in the midst of feeling tired and wanting to just run away and hide ... in the midst of just "being busy"... I can say that this week I have been showered by His grace in the most amazing ways ... I had a few unplanned meetings and conversations with people that I have not seen in a while that have become a source of such an encouragement. I was complimented in so many ways - and that was just what the doctor has prescribed - if you know what I mean :0) It was done in many small ways and simple words ... But those words meant a lot ... I am truly blessed! :0)

Here I am

2005-05-20T09:16:00.000+03:00

Here are the words to the song "Here I am" by Ffh.
This song has been my theme of the week and perfectly describes my life this week :0)

I hope these words will minister to you and touch your heart!

HERE I AM
Here I am my knees are on this floor again
Take away my pride, reveal this heart within
And send Your rain of mercy, let the healing begin
‘Cause You’ve brought me to this place and I can honestly say

That slowly I’ve forgotten all the where’s and why’s
Forgotten all the times You’ve been right by my side
And I’ve begun to think that life has passed me by
But it’s only by Your grace that I come here and say

Here I am, falling in the arms of grace
Here I am, seeing You’re the only way
Here I am, You have come to plead my case
Here I am, inside the walls of mercy and grace

Slowly I’m becoming one that’s more like You
To live the kind of life that You would have me to
But forgiveness only comes to those who ask it to
So I’m asking for Your grace as I kneel here today

So I will run into Your arms, as You reach out Your hands
I will fall into Your sweet embrace, oh Lord, here I am

Waiting for God's best!

2005-05-05T10:32:00.000+03:00

David instructs in the Psalms, Don't be impatient for the LORD to act! Travel steadily along his path (Psalm 37:34 NLT). I can't count how many times I've grabbed for something because it seemed like a good thing--only to find out that, if I would just wait on the Lord, He has something even better in store.

That's our tendency, I think. We see what looks like an open door ahead, and at first glance, it really seems like an answer to prayer or a gift from God. So we charge right on through. But if we would just wait; if we would just be patient and trust Him to make Himself clearly known, we'd find that instead of getting something okay, we'd get God's best.

I think we can all agree in saying that we'd rather have God's best than have something that's just okay. And I'd definitely rather have God's best than have something counterfeit that the enemy tries to sell me.

Lord, give me grace to wait patiently for You to act, knowing that You will come through for me in ways that will be a million times better than if I take matters into my own hands!

O LORD, you hear my voice...I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation (Psalm 5:3 NIV).

Waiting

2005-05-04T10:49:00.000+03:00

I have been thinking lately about how hard it is to wait...it's irritating to stand in looooooooooong lines and wait for your turn, it's irritating to wait for someone who is running late and didn't even bother to call you and let you know that he is running late...but the hardest thing to wait on, at least for me, is for God's best, for right and perfect mate - meant just for you - your knight in shining armor :0) !!!

Sometimes you feel like, time is just flying by and nothing is happening, well except, you're getting older. And although many look at you and say: "You are still young. Relax! Enjoy being single!" Somehow it doesn't help. What do you do with a desire to get married, have kids, to love and care and to be loved and to be cared for? How can you find the grace to wait for His best and not give in?

To be continued...

Can a Christian live a life free of sin?

2005-04-23T09:29:00.001+03:00

I think it is clear in the Scripture that we are expected to live a life apart from sin. Consider what Peter tells us in this passage: “For to this you werre called, because Christ suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps: “Who committed no sin, nor was guile found in His mouth”; who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, he did not threaten; but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously; who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness – by whose stripes you were healed” (1 Peter 2:21-24). It is clear that we are to follow in His steps; we are to live a life free of sin to the best of our ability. When we fail to ger rid of the sin in our lives, we are not able to live inharmony with the Word of God. Our relationship with the Father, Son and Holy Spirit suffers because of it.

Let’s explore a little further what happens to us when we become a Christian. When we accept Christ as our Lord and Savior we have a deep regret for the sin we have committed in times past. This regret and sorrow causes us to repent of those sins. “Repenting” is not merely saying that we are sorry for those sins. It is, on the other hand, a deep regret which causes us to change the way we live; to stop sinning!

The Bible speaks of this repenting as being “crucified” or as being “dead to sin”. Consider these passages: “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me” (Galatians 2:20); “And those who are Christ’s crucified the flesh with its passions and desires” (Galatians 5:24); “What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it?” (Romans 6:1-2). “Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:11). Being “dead to sin” or being “crucified with Christ” is the same as saying that we have departed from sin, departed from a life of sinfulness. Paul says it quite well when he asks the question: “Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound?” His reply is emphatic: “Certainly not!” We, as Christians, need to recognize that if we are to live the kind of life, which is pleasing to God, sin must not be a part of our lives.

Our Christian walk should be one, which is apart from sin. The Scriptures refer to us as “new creatures” and says that we are walking in “newness of life”. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; old things have passed away, behold, all things have become new” (2 Corinthians 5:17). “Therefore we are buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life” (Romans 6:4). “Old things have passed away” – these “old things” are the sins, which we committed while still outside of salvation. “Behold, all things have become new” – the “newness of life”, the opportunity to live apart from sin.

But is this merely an opportunity to live a life of sinless ness? No! It is much more than that. It is also a command that we should live apart from sin. Consider these passages: “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God” (Romans 12:2). “Therefore, having these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God” (2 Corinthians 7:1). “Abstain from every form of evil” (1 Thessalonians 5:22). These and other Scriptures clearly tell us that we are expected to live a life of holiness. We are expected to fight against sin in our lives and to win the victory over sin and the consequences that it has in our lives.

Many Christians say that it is impossible for us to live a life, which is completely without sin. As John said: “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8). Isn’t it a contradictory doctrine here? Or worse yet, is the Bible? Absolutely not! We are called to righteousness and holiness. We are expected to live a life indicative of that righteousness. Were we capable of a sinless life we would be expected to live such. However, the admonitions above are given so that we can take control over sin and not have sin control us.

“Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13-14). We should do as Paul says. Forget the things of the past. This includes those sins of the past, which we may look back on and remember the “fun” we had at that time. Let’s forget those. Is also includes those failures that we had as Christians trying to overcome sin. I’m sure that each one of us can look back at failures; times when we let sin have the upper hand. We need to forget those times as well. We should have learned from them, but let us not dwell in the failures.

Let us rather look to the future with boldness, knowing that with the strength of Christ and the Word of God on our side we can “press toward the goal for the prize”.

Are we going to sin in the future? In all likelihood, yes! But John tells us this: “My little children, these things I write to you, that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. And He Himself is the propitiation for our sins, and not ours only but also for the whole world” (1 John 2:1-2). If we are striving to overcome sin, and still sin, then Jesus will be our Advocate for us to the Father. Jesus substituted Himself for our sins.

On the other hand, if we do not strive to overcome sin but sin willfully, then there is no further sacrifice for those sins. “For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins” (Hebrews 10:26).

Are we expected to live a life of sinless ness? No! Are we expected to live a life, which is constantly fighting against sin in our lives, a life, which is striving to overcome sin, a life, which is pressing toward the goal? The answer is YES!

We are called to be like Christ. He hated sin, and so should we. We should hate sin because our Lord and Savior does. But we should also hate sin because we can see what it does to ourselves, our loved ones and others as well. It destroys families and wrecks marriages. It causes people to become addicted to drugs and alcohol and thus destroys their lives. It cause distrust among people, even fellow Christians. We should hate sin because we desire to do the will of God. Sin is in direct opposition to the will of God. Often times it is sin that keeps us from doing the will of God. Let us not give in to the temptations of sin, but rather strive earnestly to do the will of the Father.

Grace!

2005-04-21T10:35:00.000+03:00

We sing Amazing Grace, but I don't think we realize how amazing grace actually is. Grace is God's power, motivated by His mercy, working to fulfill His compassion.

This morning I was reading an article by Francis Frangipane called: "Shout Grace!" Here is the text:

"We are saved by grace, but what culminates in a "day of salvation" experience is actually months and even years of God quietly, yet powerfully, working in our hearts. Recall: Jesus said, "No one can come to Me, unless the Father who sent Me draws him" (John 6:44a). Do you remember that drawing power? Before we knew God, divine power was working invisibly within our hearts, drawing and wooing us to Christ.

Yet let me take this miracle of grace further, for after Jesus spoke of the Father's drawing power, He then said, "and I will raise him up on the last day" (John 6:44b). This is the power and commitment of our Father's love: from the days of our sin and rebellion even to the days long after we die, grace continues working to unite our hearts with God's. From our utterly helpless beginnings to our utterly helpless end, from being dead in sin to being dead in the grave, grace carries us to the arms of God.

Unlocking the Power of Grace
"But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places, in Christ Jesus, in order that, in the ages to come, He might show the surpassing riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God." Ephesians 2:4-8

Paul says that grace saved us "through faith." Faith unlocks the power of grace and releases it to function in our world -- and faith itself is another gift of God. The difference between both gifts is that the grace-gift must be activated by the faith-gift. We must believe that God is "rich in mercy." We must accept as true that God loves us with "great love." We must not doubt He atoned for "our transgressions." We must be confident we are "alive together with Christ."

Grace works through faith. Believing the words of grace unlocks the power of grace; the power of grace to fully transform us comes through faith. As it is written, "For of His fullness we have all received, and grace upon grace" (John 1:16). The true stride of a Christian's walk is "grace upon grace." The same grace that turned our hearts toward Christ continues to work in us, transforming even our sufferings and trials into virtue and power.

Are you in a battle? Are you struggling with finances, health, righteousness, or relationships? Your grace-miracle has already been created. But you must believe that not only has God created a grace-provision for you, but Christ is motivated by love and actually desires to show you favor.

You may feel like a loser, a sinner, a person others routinely reject -- and perhaps you are! The purpose of redemption was so that, in the ages to come, God might display through us "the surpassing riches of His grace." You may be poor in this world, but you can become rich in the transforming grace of God. Believe Him. A day will come in the future world of God when He will point to you and I, once fallen and depraved, filthy and isolated creatures, and display us before heaven and earth as radiant, transformed beings -- a glory to His workmanship and love. And it will come to pass because we believed in the grace of God to change us.

Who cares what other people think of you? God says He loves you! Indeed, His grace is working to set you free. God knows you have been struggling with desperate issues; that's one reason why He has inspired this message. His grace is reaching to you to deliver you. The means to your victory is not more prayer or more Bible study, but faith-activated grace. Of course, I strongly believe in both prayer and study, but the power to release each of us is a free gift of grace. Don't postpone your breakthrough. Believe that God's grace is here to release you!

What We Cannot Do On Our Own
We've been taught that grace is God's unmerited favor which, of course, it is. Yet unmerited favor is only one aspect of grace. In reality, grace is God's promise to do for us what we cannot do for ourselves.

The Bible says that "Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned to him as righteousness" (Romans 4:3). It doesn't mean that Abraham believed there was a God. No. Demons believe in one God and tremble! When Abraham "believed God" it meant that he believed what God had promised would come to pass. God promised to do for Abraham what Abraham and Sarah could not fulfill on their own. The Lord had promised Abraham he'd be a father of many nations. This is the glory of God's grace: it accomplishes what is otherwise impossible for us. You see, grace not only chooses me, saves me eternally, and blankets my life with mercy, but grace also works in me realities unattainable without divine help.

Consider Zechariah and the story about Zerubbabel, who was governor of Israel. The Jews had been held in Babylonian captivity for 70 years. Now, they were being restored to Jerusalem. It was Zerubbabel's task to oversee the restoration of the city. In the struggle of the battle, weariness settled on the governor. So, the Lord gave Zechariah a promise for Zerubbabel. He said,
"'Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,' says the Lord of hosts." Zechariah 4:6

God was saying, in effect, "You have labored, your enemies are many and they are strong, but this work I've set before you isn't about your abilities; it's about what I can do working through you." Likewise, our salvation isn't about our works or power. It's about believing in the Holy Spirit's power and the grace of God. Then the Lord gave Zerubbabel an important word. He said,

"What are you, O great mountain? Before Zerubbabel you will become a plain; and he will bring forth the top stone with shouts of 'Grace, grace to it!'" Zechariah 4:7

Zerubbabel had mountains in his life that were too much for him. He had a task that was beyond his abilities. Yet God promised His Spirit would help and, when it was done, multitudes would be shouting "Grace, grace!" at the finished work.

Listen, my friends, don't run from the mountains in your life, face them with faith -- and then shout "Grace, grace!" to them. Let God make your mountains into "a plain."

Let's not mutter an unbelieving whisper about grace, but shout it out loud. It doesn't say, "think about grace," but release your faith and shout "Grace, grace!" God's unmerited favor has been poured out upon you; now speak to that mountain of discouragement, sickness, or financial need -- GRACE, GRACE!

Blessed God, You have drawn me to Yourself and have sheltered my life in the impenetrable stronghold of Your grace. Forgive me for drifting back into trusting in my works or abilities. Lord, I believe in Your grace! I shout "Grace, grace!" to the mountains that stand before me! In Jesus' name!"

Blessings to you all!!!

With love,
Kristina

Do you want to see me??? :0)

2005-04-20T17:22:00.000+03:00

Me

Here is a picture of me. This was taken on April 10, 2005 in Aizkruakle (a city in Latvia) during a Catch the Fire 2 Conference, where I was translating.

Crimson Room

2005-04-20T12:38:00.000+03:00

This will drive you mad if you have time!!

There are less than 4000 people in the world who can escape this house. So have a try.
http://flash.qbol.net/pl;p/youxi/images/04042203.swf

There are 13 items hidden in this room in order to let you get out of this room.

If you found:
0-6 items, your IQ is very low
6-8 items, Low IQ
9-10 items, your IQ is normal
11-12 items, your IQ is high, above the average.
13 items found and get out of the room, there are less than 4000 people in the world can do it.

Hey!

2005-04-19T16:35:00.000+03:00

Dear Friends!
So this is my first official post :0)

I hope you will enjoy visiting this site!!!

Luv ya,
Kristina